Jacksonville Zoo and Hotel Trip

We needed a mini-trip to do something fun over Ben's spring break. We chose to go to the Jacksonville Zoo because it's only two and a half hours away and the zoo has a new dinosaur exhibit.  We left Friday morning, went straight to the zoo, stayed in a hotel in Jacksonville, and then went to Wild Adventures Theme Park on the season's opening day the next day.

Eddie stuck in the cage at the dino exhibit-notice Peter climbing up the ladder.


Eddie and Peter in the cage.

Creegan did not like the dinosaurs!  They were very scary!  He wanted out of there!

I love my awesome hat; I know I look stupid, but it's great protection from the sun for this Florida girl!  Yes, I am beginning to accept that I am a Florida girl (it only took five years!).

at the hotel-Creegan's favorite place for his finger ever since he had a cold a few weeks ago!

 

Eddie and Creegan-cute brothers   

My absolute favorite part of this trip was that we made a spontaneous sunglasses purchase at the store for me and all the kids.  These boys look stylish!  

Creegan refused to stand by us for the sunglasses picture!



Enjoying some pre-bedtime tv in their pull-out sofa bed.  Creegan, as always, is laying on Peter.

First thing in the morning, Eddie and Peter got up to color their menus from dinner the night before!  So adorable!

Other highlights of the trip:  dinner.  We rediscovered sitdown resturants this week.  We have avoided them for almost a year now due to Creegan's terrible behavior in one last summer.  Now we were able to enjoy a great meal.  Creegan ate the entire time.  He did not stop shoveling food into his mouth.  He must have been hungry!  So fun to see them enjoying their food and actually eating!  

Grandma and Grandpa Came to Visit!!!

 playing with the guns Grandma and Grandpa brought; notice target hung on window and Grandpa outside working on the van!  Thanks, Dad!

 look at that smile!  what a happy boy!

 playing hide and seek at the Capitol

 Creegan will not be outdone by his brothers.  He was nervous, though, to go down this incline.  He stuck his chin out and did it, though!  Look at that expression!

 ledge walking

 making cookies with Grandma, chocolate cookies with mint chips, Grandma's and Eddie's favorite

We played games lots.  Eddie and Peter loved playing with their grandparents!

 Grandma helping Creegers with "Jam", Creegan's favorite puzzle, Traffic Jam; he asks to do this puzzle every day.  When Grandma got here, Creegan needed a little help.  While she was here, Creegan learned to do this puzzle all by himself.  He is so impressive!

 We went to see the Monster Truck at the mall.

My parents came to visit for a week.  We had a lot of fun plans, but Eddie and Peter both had fevers during their visit (Creegan's fever was over by the time they arrived, but he still had a cold), and it rained like crazy at least half of the days they were here.  We had a lot of simple fun, and it was really nice!!  The kids favorite thing to do was to go to the hotel my parents were staying at for breakfast, cartoon watching, and bed jumping.  We did this most every morning.  Eddie and Peter even went to the hotel with them one night to hang out.  Eddie came home at 9 p.m., but Peter slept over!!!  They also loved having Grandma and Grandpa watch them ride their scooters, trikes, and bikes.  After my parents were gone, Eddie and Creegan were both disappointed to not have them with us when we went riding.  These kids are so lucky to have such great grandparents, and I am lucky to have such great parents!!  

January Books

Books I finished reading in January 2013:

Matched by Ally Condie 4/5 stars

Unwind by Neal Shusterman 3/5 stars
The setup of the book is so far out there that it's hard to read with any sense of concern. The book is set post a second civil war that was about abortion. The war ended by both sides agreeing against prebirth abortions but for a postbirth "unwinding" (where are all the parts of the child are taken and used as transplants in other people), if the child is disagreeable, between the ages of 13 and 17. The book mostly tells the story of three unwinds on the run. It was good to read but not great. I cared about the characters but didn't love them. Another interesting way of life of this society is they can "stork" their unwanted babies. They leave them on a doorstep and the owner of the doorstep is required by law to keep the baby and raise it as his/her own.

We Have Always Lived in the Castle by Shirley Jackson  5/5 stars
Excellent book. Well-written. Understated and subtle. The characters are interesting. A great book for a book club.

January Movies

Ben and I recently had a conversation about what we would do with our time if we could do anything we want.  I decided to embrace the things we mentioned and incorporate them in to my life as much as possible.  Movie watching and discussing was one of those important things to me.  So here is a list of the movies I got to watch in January 2013.  I began writing reviews for the movies closer to the end of the month, and I will include those reviews here.

Beasts of the Southern Wild
Little Birds
Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Dog Days

About Cherry

17 Girls
Django Unchained
Ted
The Bourne Legacy
Silver Linings Playbook (4/5 stars)

An excellent movie. Bradley Cooper's acting was stand-out, definitely warranting his nomination for Best Actor at the Oscar's this year. Jennifer Lawrence was good, too, but I wouldn't have thought Oscar-worthy.

The Good Doctor  (4/5 stars)

This movie was intense and anxiety-producing. Orlando Bloom's acting was understated, which was perfect for his quiet, boring, self-righteous doctor character. It was difficult to listen to his doctor mentor, Rob Morrow, as he mumbled every line. I liked that the movie had two endings, the one the doctor considered and the one he actually chose. The movie ended with an abrupt cut-away, which was pointless and just made me think Netflix malfunctioned. Any movie that can illicit this much emotional response is worth checking out.

Searching for Sugar Man  (4/5 stars)

A good movie. Rodriquez is an interesting character. At the beginning of the movie, he plays in small clubs with his back to the audience. At the end of the movie, he is playing in front of thousands with ease. He had no performance experience in the interim! His knowledge of his fame didn't change him; he continued to work construction and live in the same small home in Detroit. Some interesting topics of discussion after watching this movie would be: the role race plays in fame in the USA in the 70s, the impact of the internet on our lives and our knowledge, the impact of music on bringing about social change, and how anger, or the absence of it, can affect our quality of life.

 The Paperboy(2/5 stars)

I enjoyed the movie in the beginning, though it was consistently inconsistent. By the end it was too needlessly confusing and inconsistent to be satisfying or enjoyable. My biggest frustration was the mid-scene cuts that cut back in to the same scene but with things slightly different and never explained. Nicole Kidman's acting is worth mentioning. It is fun to see an actor cast in a role opposite of the roles she usually plays. She did it well. Her character was flat, though, and the little change thrown in at the end seemed abrupt and underdeveloped. John Cusack was hardly in the film but stood out as a selfish, angry, crazy convicted murderer; his character was too underdeveloped though to stand-out or emotionally affect the audience much. Matthew McConaughey was himself-boo! The housekeeper/acting mother character was really probably the best acted in the movie. She was the narrator of the story. Her character brought humor and perspective to the film and story. There were too many pointless characters, for example John Cusack's character's uncle. He had some sort of commune (?) living in the wilderness that was unexplained and thus confusing. I found Matthew McConaughey's writing partner's character to be pointless, as well. His character was a sloppy excuse at character development that just emphasized the character underdevelopment.

Hotel Transylvania 

The kids loved this movie. The animation and voices were great. It was funny.

I was lucky to see two movies in the theater in January!! So fun! By far my favorite movie this month was Django Unchained. It's not for the easily offended or disturbed, but, oh, it was soo good! Thought-provoking, well-done, and so funny! The worst movie I saw this month was Ted. The most pointless movie I saw this month was Beasts of the Southern Wild. Why it is up for Best Picture and why that terrible young actress is up for Best Actress, beats me!!

Cool Quote by Cicero

If any man cannot feel the power of God when he looks at the stars, then I doubt whether he is capable of any feeling at all. In the heavens there is nothing accidental, nothing arbitrary, nothing out of order, nothing erratic. Everywhere is order, truth, reason, constancy. Those things which lack these qualities - all that is false and delusive and full of error - such things either circle the earth below the orbit of the moon (the lowest of the heavenly bodies) or have their being upon the earth itself. But from the mysterious order and enduring wonder of the heavens flows all saving power and grace. If any one thinks it mindless then he himself must be out of his mind!

Fulness

There are certain phrases and expressions used at church that are confusing and, I am beginning to think, misused.  I am on a journey to understand what is actually meant by these expressions.  I wanted to share an insight I had about the phrase "fulness of the Gospel".  The Doctrine and Covenants says that the Book of Mormon contains the "fulness of the Gospel".  I think when people speak of this reference they speak as if the Gospel in its completeness is in the Book of Mormon.  Is that true?  Why do we have other scriptures?  Why do we have additional revelation?   What does fulness actually mean?  It means enough to be content and not want more.  When I am full from eating, I have not consumed every possible piece of food in the world, or even all the food at my disposal.  When my car's tank is full, there is still a lot of gas that is not in my tank.  My tank has reached its capacity.  So maybe saying we have the fulness of the Gospel just means that we have enough to be satisfied for now, but possibly there is much more to have.  And perhaps we should be a little less satisfied and a little hungrier for more.

Wearing Pants to Church

My heart wore pants to church on Sunday, December 16, but I wore a dress.  I am glad I did, too, because afterwards there was so much negativity online about the project (from friends and acquaintances!).  “Women aren’t unequal in our church and people who think they are are in danger of losing their testimonies and leaving the church”, pretty much sums it up.  I am really disappointed. 

I was also really disappointed with the attitudes from members of my church about the election this year. At first I thought it was just a couple of funny extremists who had the idea that Governor Romney losing the election was surely a “sign of the times”.  Based on FB and blog reactions, however, I think many members of my church thought religion was the most important factor in this presidential race. 

I think many people were confused about why women were wearing pants to church.  The purpose was to start a conversation.  I think the specific reasons were different for every feminist.  Here’s why I wanted to wear pants: 

Women and men are not equal in our church.  It is most important to me that members of our church realize this one fact.  I think it is news to most people. It was news to me when I wrote my last blog about feminism.  I thought I wasn’t a feminist because I don’t have an issue with traditional gender roles.   I have since come to understand that there is a problem in my church and that I am a feminist.  A friend of mine wrote about how happy she is that she has never been treated as less because of her gender.  Here’s the thing-I think we are all treated as less, but we expect it and accept it.  We don’t feel bad because we have heard all of the talks about how special we are simply because we are women, and we believe them.  “Separate but equal” was illegal when it came to race in our schools, so why do we accept it with roles of women and men and church?

Here’s one example of how women are not equal in our church.  Women aren’t allowed to be ordinance workers at the temple if they have children at home.  Men are.  So men can work 40 + hours a week away from their children and families and then take a Saturday once a month to work in the temple, but women can’t.  What is wordlessly being said by this rule?  That it’s never okay for women to be away from their children.  Men and women are both taught to put family first, but rules are made that force women to do so and not men.  Now some temples do allow women with children to clean the temple or do secretarial work for the temple.  These types of service aren’t strictly forbidden in the rules, so maybe these temples are trying to find a way to allow women a chance to serve.  It feels like 1950s idea of gender roles, though.

President Hinckley was asked once in an interview in Australia if Heavenly Father could ever change the rules about not having women as Priests.  His answer wasn’t no.  It was, in fact,  “Yes.  But there is no agitation for that.  Our women are happy.  They’re satisfied.” (http://agitatingfaithfully.org/post;jsessionid=2803821D898EB321688A9873399DCE20?id=the-quote-in-context )  So, change can and does happen in our church (I think this may be news for a lot of people.  I know I had to learn within the past couple of years that policies in our church do change.), but not without revelation.  Revelation doesn’t come if it isn’t sought.  What would make the prophet seek revelation about the role of women in our church?  Agitation.  We, as women, have to admit that we aren’t happy and that we aren’t satisfied.  Wearing pants was one way for people to show that they want church leaders to seek revelation and change policies and practices about women in the church.    

Many people complained about the inappropriateness of women “protesting” at church.  Wearing pants, when women aren’t commanded to, isn’t a protest, but it is a way to agitate. 

To pants or not to pants:

When I heard feminists were wearing pants to church instead of traditional skirts and dresses, I told Ben I was going to do it, too.  Ben worried that pants may be a distraction from the purpose of church, worshipping.   I took some time soul searching and realized wearing pants would, of course, not hinder my ability to worship. If anything, it would increase my worship.  I felt humbled by the possible change in my routine that for the first time in a while the worshipping would have been meaningful instead of rote.

I got nervous, though, and went back and forth about my decision a few times.  I decided to ask myself the classic question, “What would Jesus do?”.  Hmm, well, Jesus didn’t hang with the crowd of saints who had been worshipping at church in their particular way for generations.  He was more interested in the one than the 99.  He definitely would have been all for this.  Jesus was known for his tradition-breaking. 

Here’s why I wore a dress:

I ultimately came to the conclusion that it didn’t matter to Heavenly Father or Jesus what I wore to church, but it did matter to me.  I wish it didn’t, but it did.  I have never been an envelope pusher.  I know that change needs to happen, but I am just not the one to try to break the system.  I didn’t want to mark myself.  And I knew me wearing pants wouldn’t really change anything.  (It’s not like the prophet was going to be at my church!)

What really decided it for me was a baptism I went to on Saturday the 15^th.   I looked around at all the women and girls in their dresses and skirts, and they looked beautiful to me.  Of course this doesn’t mean that I think women are less beautiful if the material around their legs is sewn.  But the way people look at church is the way people have looked at church my whole life.  It looks right to me.  It looks beautiful to me.  My issue with feminism isn’t with wearing dresses to church.  Dresses and skirts are comfortable and I wear them by choice many weekdays (especially when the weather is warm).  I wear them on Sundays not by choice, but no longer by obligation.  Because of wearing-pants-to-church day I am now aware that what women and men wear to church doesn’t matter to Heavenly Father or Jesus.  I knew wearing pants, while it wouldn’t distract me from my worship, would distract many from their worship.  That wouldn’t have been my fault; people are always looking for a distraction from worshipping.  But I didn’t want to be an easy target for the mind wanderings of fellow churchgoers.  So I wore a dress.  

Thanksgiving

 Creegan enjoyed watching bears and Big Bird in the parade.  He sat down to watch every time he heard a guitar playing while someone sang.

 Getting the Christmas tree out of the box

 Creegan loves taking one arm out of his shirts.  This poor kid has a chronically messy face!

 Admiring the tree

 Creegers was fascinated with the lights

 My cute boys!

 Creegan automatically lifted wreaths to his face.  He loved looking at himslef in the mirror.  I wish we could have gotten a better picture!

 Excited about the stockings,

 and Christmas books,

and all the decor!

For Thanksgiving we had intended to make the traditional dinner, but it was a hard week.  I no longer want to ever cause myself unnecessary stress.  I assume there will be a time soon when I have the energy to make Thanksgiving dinner, but it wasn't yesterday.  We got up and still turned on the parade, like I usually do while I make the food.  Eddie told me a few weeks ago that the parade is the most boring thing we ever do.  He watched the entire thing, though, this year and only complained once.  During the parade, Peter kept begging to go to a parade.  I promised to take him to the next parade here.  Watching the parade made the day feel like a holiday, and it got me excited for Christmas.  So we decided to put up our Christmas tree.  This is such a fun year because all our boys are old enough to enjoy the holiday and Creegan is young enough to be learning it for the first time.  Yesterday he learned who Santa is and learned to say Christmas.  He loves the lights on the tree.  He laid under the tree at bedtime last night and almost fell asleep.  He loved putting ornaments on the tree.  He always pointed at a high up spot and wanted to be lifted up to hang his ornaments high.  I told Peter I would sing him a Christmas song at bedtime.  He asked if we had to sing a Christmas song.  He preferred me to make up a song about Angry Birds.  :)  Happy Thanksgiving, and Merry Christmas, everybody!

What I Think...About Feminism

I am not a feminist, at least I don't call myself one.  Recently, though, I realized how passionate I am about some issues that fall under the topic of feminism.  I decided I need to explore feminist ideas to see what I think.  

When I went to the temple to receive my endowment for the first time, I felt offended as a female.  After that initial experience, Ben and I went to the temple every week for ten months.  It took time, effort, and lots of prayers to view things in a way that didn't feel offensive to me as a female.  

Here's what I think:  Our culture and society is part of who we are and how we think.  The United States of America's culture is definitely patriarchal.  Joseph Smith, a young boy, received a revelation to start the church I am now a part of.  Most people thought he was insane.  If he would have been a young girl, though, even less people would have listened.  

I believe Heavenly Father lets us function and move forward with our natural-occurring misunderstandings and misinformation.  Heavenly Father reveals to us only the things we seek.  We don't seek things that we take for granted as "natural".  For example, in our church, black males were given the Priesthood (the power of God on earth) in 1979.  I don't believe Heavenly Father ever told the prophets prior to '79 to not give the priesthood to black males.  I believe the prophets assumed that black men shouldn't have it because they lived in a time in which people that were black were viewed as less than people that were white.  It took a prophet living in a different time with different ideas to question and pray for revelation about this in order for Heavenly Father to reveal how things really should be. 

I read some of Rough Stone Rolling, the biography about Joseph Smith.  Apparently it wasn't uncommon for women in the days of Joseph Smith to use the Priesthood to give blessings.  I thought this was a really neat idea.  Why would Heavenly Father not want all of his children to be able to use his power on earth?  Why would he only want males to be able to have it?  I don’t think there are good answers to these questions. 

If one of my kids got seriously hurt and lay dying and I was alone with him, I would not hesitate to call on Heavenly Father’s power to heal him, and I do not believe I would be acting out of line.

Ben asked me recently if I am waiting for it to be revealed that women should have the Priesthood.  I am not.  I don’t expect that to happen.  I have never taken that idea seriously, but now I am wondering why not. 

I really, really hate that in every lesson about the Priesthood at church, some woman always makes the comment that women don’t need the Priesthood because we have the babies.  Like the Priesthood and motherhood are equal and comparable instead of being two totally different things!  Often I think the point of these comments is that men need the Priesthood to be humbled and made more righteous and closer to Heavenly Father.  Women have motherhood that does that.  Or, some of them may even be implying that women are superior and don’t need anything to be made closer to Heavenly Father, which is just idiotic and untrue.  There are certain things that are just said at church that actually make no sense, but somehow we have heard them so many times that we don’t realize how dumb they are. 

I actually think the idea of women not being allowed the Priesthood would be more troubling if our ministry was paid.  Most normal people don’t seek positions in our church because there is no financial compensation for the positions and the work for the positions has to come out of each person’s already limited time.  If people could seek jobs at church as their careers, it would be more limiting for women to not be allowed certain positions.

I do not like the idea that motherhood is a punishment for Eve eating the fruit in the Garden of Eden.  Yes, motherhood is hard and childbirth is painful, but I don’t view Heavenly Father as a jerk.  I think you would have to view Heavenly Father as a jerk to really believe this.  It is offensive if anyone really thinks this is true.

I don’t know if there is a Heavenly Mother.  The idea makes sense, but why don’t we hear about her?  Why don’t we talk about her?  I think the commonly passed around idea that we don’t talk about her in order to be respectful is offensive.  As a mother, if my kids never talked to me or about me or acknowledged me in any way, I wouldn’t feel loved.  I would feel unloved and unappreciated.  Ben, as my husband, would know this and would not encourage behavior that made me feel this way.  So why would Heavenly Father?  I don’t think Heavenly Father has encouraged this.  I think church leaders, men, have not sought revelation regarding this issue, at least not that’s been made public.  I think we can seek our own revelation for our own sake. 

I don’t spend my time feeling like less of a person in my church because of my gender because I believe what I have been taught-my role is different but equally important.  It is sad to me, though, that I have had to work to see my role as equally important, which is something men have never had to do. I think there are more concerns for raising a daughter in this church than a son.    I think there is a lot of untrue and inappropriate propaganda at church that is presented as fact and truth.  I definitely don’t like to hear stupid people say stupid stuff that makes no sense and shows no sign of actual thinking.   

Much more to come!

    

What I Think

I am going to start posting some of my thoughts on here.  I don't discuss my opinions on current issues or hot-button topics with anyone but Ben.  During the election, for example, I got tired of people assuming I think the same as them.  I don't.  I feel dishonest because I don't say anything.

I keep my thoughts to myself for a few reasons.  I worry that I can't hold my own in a serious discussion because I am not perfectly informed on the issues.  (Not that that stops others from putting their opinions out there...)  I also keep quiet because people are mean about those who think differently than them.  Truth be told, I don't like people to disagree with me.  I much prefer people agreeing with me.  :)  

So I want to be honest for my own sake and sanity.  I also want to push myself to think more-to be able to better defend and further develop my lines of thinking .  I want to be more of a complete person and not just the one role that I play with most of my time.  Also, I used to really enjoy writing.  I never thought I was any good at it until I could no longer do it (time-wise and mental capacity-wise).  Then I looked back at previous writings and admitted I wasn't so bad.  

My ideas are not the norm for people of my culture and religion and life choices.  I want to be a voice offering a different way to look at things.  I know people don't change, so I don't have grandiose expectations.  (I am aware that not many people will even read these thoughts.)  But, perhaps, I can be successful at bringing awareness that many lines of thought can exist in our culture and religion.  I used to see things as black and white, and now I can admit that it's all gray.  So here's to bringing a little more gray to the world!

Fair 2012

 On the ferris wheel

 Creegan is in love with "wheels" (ferris wheels), so he was so excited to arrive at the fair and see the "wheel".  "Get out!", he squealed.

 Handsome, Eddie, and look how happy Peter is!

 Silly Peter talking to a goat.

 Eddie begged and begged to ride in that stroller.

It was a success!

Our kids love going to the fair.  It's become a tradition.  They were so worried we weren't going to make it this year with everything going on.  We squeaked in on the last day.  It was a lot of fun!  We watched the pigs race, we fed the animals, everyone got to choose three rides, and we ate an elephant ear.  We picked up a pizza on the way home, and Creegan fell asleep in the car.  A successful night!  November 12, 2012

Pumpkin Carving

 Look at that stuff!

 Wearing baggies to not have to touch the goopy stuff!

 What a cutie!  He loved putting the lid on and taking it off.

 An adorable baggy-wearing boy!

 Love that face!

 Creegan took one arm out of his shirt.  I love this happy smile!

 Eddie has great facial expressions!

 Peter and his pumpkin

 Love my boys!!!

 Happy, silly Peter!

 Creegan's, Eddie's, and Peter's

This year we carved pumpkins on November 5.  We got the pumpkins before Halloween, but with me getting sick and being in the hospital for the holiday, we never carved them until after.  This was the first year the kids had their own pumpkins rather than just having one big family pumpkin.  Of course we did the carving for the kids.  They just told us what they wanted.  I asked Creegan what shapes he wanted the different facial features to be.  They were so excited to put them outside when we were done.  They couldn't wait for someone to come to our door and see the pumpkins.  Of course after we were done carving, I realized we didn't have any candles to light them with.  The boys were really disappointed.  We rectified that the next day, though!  So glad we could do all our fun Halloween stuff, even if it was in November!